


Bad Pick-Up Lines for a Good Time

by dasfreefree, imagine_that_haikyuu



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Bad Pick-Up Lines, Drinking, F/M, Female!Reader - Freeform, Fluff, Self-Indulgent, Side Story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-27 05:43:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17156315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dasfreefree/pseuds/dasfreefree, https://archiveofourown.org/users/imagine_that_haikyuu/pseuds/imagine_that_haikyuu
Summary: For your anniversary with Ukai, you suggest somethingunusualto celebrate the occasion: going to the bar, pretending you don't know each other, and have him try to pick you up. Ukai agrees to play along, equipped with nothing but horrible pick-up lines and his own wit to try and charm you all over again.It turns out this might be more entertaining than he anticipated.





	Bad Pick-Up Lines for a Good Time

**Author's Note:**

> This is kind of a side story to an Ukai/reader WIP I've been working on for sometime now. Things have changed in that WIP since this was written, but pertinent details/plot points have been included in this work so it can stand on its own.
> 
> This scenario was originally posted on September 11, 2016 to our [tumblr](https://imagine-that-haikyuu.tumblr.com/post/150264960603/i-request-something-fluffy-with-ukai-i-dont-know). Some edits have been made since then. 
> 
> Writer: Rachel Lauren
> 
> Anonymous asked:I request something fluffy with Ukai! I don't know his character too well, but you seem to like him so maybe you have an   
>  idea in your head? Hah i know you said to be specific but how about something to indulge yourself? (This is more for u but only if you want to)

“Do I know you?”

Setting your drink down and glaring over at the man taking a seat next to you, you let out a sound akin to a game show buzzer. “Lame, Keishin. Try again.”

He huffed. The least you could do was make your odd request easy for him, but you were adamant to have him say something that could make even you blush.

Ukai was awful at pickup lines; they came so unnaturally to him and always felt awkward leaving his mouth. When you said to him, “You know, I kind of miss getting hit on by random guys” after he asked you what you wanted to do for your anniversary—the anniversary of when you started dating in high school, not the more recent reconciliation —he was definitely taken aback.

You were surprised that he had even remembered the date in the first place. There were times where it slipped your mind, but you recalled enough to know that you confessed just a little before the Spring High prelims as second-years. And now here he was, offering to treat you to something as if it were White Day and suddenly you couldn’t think of anything else you would rather do.

He wholeheartedly expected that you were going suggest something a little more decadent, like an expensive dinner he could hardly afford at some upscale restaurant that he felt out of place in. (That dinner with your parents the other month still left a bit of bad taste in his mouth. Not that he disliked the couple, but it was like they were from a different  _planet_. It was a wonder how they managed to have a daughter as seemingly normal as you.)

You wanted him to take you to a bar, —your usual spot, actually—pretend like you weren’t dating, and hit on you until you were satisfied enough to go home with him. You had seen it in a movie and thought it was cute. This was something middle-aged couples tried when they wanted to rekindle their relationship, not something twenty-six-year-olds did just to get their kicks.

“Why?” was the only thing that came out of his mouth after you listed off the steps to your plan. Twiddling a lock of your hair, an action more indicative of your high school self, you shrugged with your free arm.

“I miss the attention,” you confessed, arms crossed in front of you. “Whenever I go somewhere now, it’s usually with you, so most guys don’t even look my way.”

He groaned. Weren’t you supposed to be his girlfriend? Why did you care if other people hit on you?

You either ignored his clear frustration with this idea or just didn’t notice. “Not to mention, we’ve both been so busy lately. I kind of just want you to give me your undivided attention for a little bit. I mean, unless you want to dote on me or something, but you know as well as I do that that’s not really our thing.”

“Yeah, but couldn’t I just do that over dinner or a night in?”

Now it was your turn to let out a frustrated groan. “Just humor me for, like, an hour.”

So with a sigh, Ukai agreed reluctantly: Tuesday night at the bar it would be. You both left your respective practices earlier than usual, and he made sure that his mother was able to cover for him at the store. When you entered the bar, not a single other soul was there. Walking in together and then sitting at separate tables and ordering your own drinks earned you some confused looks from the bartender.

Which brought him to this very moment: racking his brain for some sort of line that would get you to play along. He tried looking up a few online the day before, but most of them were completely dorky and some of them even a little  _Oedipal_  of all things that he didn’t even want to know why they had made it onto a list of “50 Best Pickup Lines”. 

You brought your drink up to your mouth again, teeth gently clenching down on the cocktail straw as you stared with a bored expression in front of you. Maybe it would have been better off to have gone to dinner. Still in thought, he reached into his back pocket for a cigarette, and patted the other one for his lighter. Actually, that gave him idea.

“You, uh, got a light?”

You turned to him again and set your drink down once more. A little cliché, but it was something you could work with.

“No, sorry. I don’t smoke,” you stated flatly. But there was a mischievous glint in your eyes as you spoke and you could only hope that he picked up on it.

He raised an eyebrow, a cheeky grin starting to tug at his lips. “You sure? I could have sworn I saw you smoking earlier.”

“Must have been some other girl.”

Bingo.

“Or maybe I just confused it with that smoke rising from your body because you’re so damn hot.”

You blinked once, then let out a snort before bursting into unbridled laughter, only amplified by the fact that you were the only two in the place. You slapped his back, knocking the breath out him because after all this time you still didn’t know your own strength. He coughed as you wiped the tears now rolling out from your eyes.

“Oh my god, Keishin.” You let out a “hoo” and fanned yourself to help calm down from your fit.

“I’m trying,” he grumbled. “This isn’t easy, you know.”

“No, that was great!” You placed an elbow on the table and ran your hand through your hair, getting back into character. “So are you gonna buy me a drink or what?”

He finally fished his lighter from his pocket and lit his cigarette. After exhaling a small cloud of smoke, he said, “(Y/N), if I had more money, I’d buy you the world.”

Your jaw dropped, followed by a single laugh. Where did  _that_  come from? You batted your eyelashes at him playfully.  "How sweet. But maybe you could just start with a rum and Coke.“

Now, it was his turn to chuckle. “Looks like I’m starting to get the hang of this.”

As he tapped his cigarette over the ashtray in front of him, you placed a hand on his thigh and leaned in, capturing his lips in a slow kiss. There was a moment of hesitation from him, only because you had caught him off-guard, but he relaxed into the kiss as he normally did. He extinguished the cigarette in the tray, using his now free hands to cup your face. You only pulled away when a group of rowdy college students wandered in and wolf-whistled at the scene before them. But with your half-lidded gazes unwavering from each other, it felt as if it was still only the two of you there.

“Let’s go back to my place,” you said quietly.

“Already? I was just getting started.” He rolled his eyes towards the ceiling before focusing back on you. “Not to mention, I still have to buy you a drink.”

A slow blink. A soft smile. “Mmm, I don’t think there’s a whole lot left for you say that could make me want to go home with you even more than I already do.”

“That’s because you’re already head-over-heels for me.” He lifted his beer to his lips.

He wasn’t wrong, but you insisted. “Come on, babe. You won me over fair and square this round.” You trailed the back of your fingers along his spine to up to his neck and down again, taking note of the goosebumps already forming on his arms. He hated when you did that only because you knew how much he  _loved_  it. “Also, I may have a present for you at my place. Well, it was more of a present for myself, but I have this distinct feeling that you’re really gonna like it, if you catch my drift.”

You punctuated it with a sassy wink and a click of your tongue. The only thing missing were the finger guns. He rolled his eyes, but even he was smiling at the thought.

“Jeez, could you make it any more obvious?”

He paid the tab and left the tip. It wasn’t often that you two were affectionate in public, —that kiss back inside only happened because you were virtually alone and even the gentle caress at the end there was unusual—but as you walked back to your apartment, he draped an arm over your shoulders. You wrapped one of your own around his back and rested your head on his shoulder.

It wasn’t a typical anniversary date, but it certainly was one for the books.


End file.
